July 9, 2019

#JournalingJuly - July 9th

So last night I went out to the #PressStartATL event hosted by Controllerise. DOPE vibes. Hip-Hop, Anime, Video Games, Food. @MicxSic always holding it down emceeing, @stlndrms cookin' up the musical funk & other impressive talents take their turn to impress an already pleased crowd. @takamarugaiden was in the building holding down the entry. Super chill. Definitely catch them on Monday's at the Monday Night Brewery Garage, 9:30pm. It'll be worth your time.

It was my first time at that venue, as it had been a while since I had been back to one of their events... and sheesh! What a nice surprise. Really impressed with the space & their execution. Anyway, I found myself in quite a peculiar vibe. I was marveled by the simple things. Observing the minutiae of the venue & it's aesthetics. People watching, just a bit. Dancing in my own little bubble, watching the anime projected onto the fake mantelpiece animal heads on the wall. I didn't read into it too much. Oh and there were these two comfy & stylish armchairs just inside the entryway too. I have no idea why I felt so compelled to try them both.

I was tickled by an interaction that was seemingly pure, yet awkward & uncertain. I was dumbfounded by another interaction, with it's frank & unrestricted certainty. I found peace in the music, in the movement. I found peace in not wanting to stand out... to enjoy my space while still sharing space with others. Just having fun moving, wiggling & jukin' about. There was even an e-sports coaching vendor set up, Walimu, which I found fascinating — considering the rise of e-sports across the globe right now & how the increasing demand for streaming video game competitions. For them, I think it's a wise approach worth exploring.

At some point when the will called, I made my way back outside. The front entryway to this establishment was spot on. I truly enjoyed the setup. A touch of nature & ambience. Greenery, cozy sitting spaces, a bench, log seats. To my surprise, it was all conveniently placed right next to the boardwalk.

I made my way over, & simply started walking. I had no interests in going far, but I had no desire to stop myself either. I simply wanted to move & be at peace with the moment.

There, walking with myself, I reflected on life once more. I laughed at the silly things I have done, like getting in my own way. I forgave myself of some foolish mistakes. I resolved myself in some decisions I made. I gazed upon the mural painted by @Migueldoesart. I steadied my mind & visualized the future. With an infinite number of directions I could take, some paths seemed clearer than others. Fewer seemed viable. One was most desirable.

Art by @Migueldoesart

The path that seems it would provide me with the utmost fulfillment, in some ways, seems to be the path in which I am quickest to erect a multitude of barriers. "Well, there's this.." and "Oh but there's that..." I have quickly dissuaded myself. Here I am, a Freelance Entrepreneur, not even working for anyone else currently, & still I find ways to fathom how something I'm fully capable of doing is not possible.

Surely, I know that it is indeed. Though that too, seems to give pause for what would be an unrelenting forward momentum towards the end goal. The Pros & Cons are sometimes truly difficult to weigh when it comes to deciding on how our life may unfold.

Thinking of that, brought to mind a quote that I have come to truly respect & acknowledge:

“I see it all perfectly; there are two possible situations — one can either do this or that. My honest opinion and my friendly advice is this: do it or do not do it — you will regret both.” ― Soren Kierkegaard (Either/Or: A Fragment of Life)

All the Best,

Sean aka Mr. Wildenfree


July 9, 2019
Mr. Wildenfree
Peculiar Ponderer. Lyrical Dreamer. Creatively Expressing Balance In Duality.

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